You Are Good Enough

Quote

Imbedded in our parental DNA are traits from our own childhood upbringing.  If you take a moment and listen carefully you can almost hear your mother firmly suggesting that you ‘be quiet’ or your father impatiently demanding that you ‘sit down and finish your dinner’.

How many times have you told your child that she’s too noisy or too energetic?  Or perhaps your child is pensive and you announce to your friend that ‘she’s so shy’ or maybe that ‘it takes her a while to get used to new people’.

The above examples may seem like ordinary interactions between parent and child.  But to a child, this type of exchange slowly robs children of their desire to express themselves freely, they begin to develop feelings of imperfection and start dwelling in the land of misbelief in the form of ‘I’m not good enough.’

good_enoughYou may be thinking that I’m exaggerating a child’s feelings based on a few harmless and necessary directives.  But repetitive ‘corrections’ that dampen a young child’s creativity and free expression often produces teens who look for approval with everything in their life and tend to follow the crowd, leaving independent thought kicked to the curb.

Even before she speaks her first words, your child is good enough.  She is good enough to cry out when she is hungry.  She is good enough to take her first steps.  She is good enough to ride her first bike.  She is good enough to make little decisions from what shoes to wear with her shorts to when to put down the fork and stop eating.

It is a good idea to allow children to comfortably express their true feelings.  They are not the feelings of their friends or their parents, but their own.  They are independent feelings, regardless of what other people think.  True feelings are good enough feelings.

Demonstrate with your words and behavior, multiple times a day, how much you truly love your child.  Giving unconditional love is the greatest way for your child to establish a strong knowing that she is good enough.  Let us help you share positive moments with your child with our weekly Joy Kids Express or follow Joy Kids Universe on Pinterest for the latest Joy Kids Joy Tips. With a built-in ‘good enough’ compass she will grow into a very confident, compassionate, vibrant adult.

Do you have some thoughts of your own on this topic? Please leave your comments below.

By, Joanne Henig, Co-Founder
Joy Kids Universe, LLC
The Law of Attraction for Kids
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Your Child Is Not Your “Friend”

There has been much debate on whether or not your child should be your “friend”. Just what does being a “friend” to your child mean? It boils down to the responsibilities of a parent as compared to those of a friend. Consider the following factors.

The relationship of a parent to a child is fixed. Whether the child was born of the parent, or adopted, the child is part of a family unit and all that it entails. The physical and emotional relationship between parent and child goes far beyond the relationship with others who do not belong to the family.

The relationship of a friend to a friend is variable. It all depends on the friends involved, and the nature of their friendship. For some it may be deep, like Casey Rose and The Joybug. For others it may be superficial. A friendship may start on a very casual basis, with little or no mutual obligations. Gradually, it may deepen as the friends get to know each other better. Or, it may peter out.

The responsibilities of a parent towards the child are clear and well-defined. There is a certain minimum of obligations which a parent must fulfill towards a child under its loving a childcare.  Among these are the proper care and nurture of a child, and to love a child without judgement. This includes the feeding, clothing, sheltering and protection of the child. It encompasses the education of the child, and the development of the right attitudes and sense of values.

The responsibilities of a friend can be flexible. This, again, depends upon the nature of the friendship. There are certain responsibilities of a parent that a friend is not obliged, or expected, to bear. If a friend chooses to take on these responsibilities, that is purely optional.

The responsibilities of a parent and a friend may overlap or even conflict. This is especially true in the case of discipline. Every parent is expected to discipline the child properly to ensure its proper development. On the other hand no friend is expected to discipline the other friend.

In short, while some characteristics of friendship may be helpful in the relationship of a child with its parent, being simply a “friend” to your child will be falling short of your obligations as a parent. Hop on board The Joy Kids Express for more joyful tips.

 

Build A Foundation of LOVE

Joy Kids Universe delivers The Joy Kids Express into your inbox weekly. These positive expressions are meant to be shared with all the wonderful children in your life. Begin teaching children gratitude and joy. Whether you are a parent, a grandparent or a caregiver, you regularly have opportuities to inspire young children. JKU provides a quick and simple ‘joyful thought’ each week and offers fun suggestions on how to “share the joy”.Making a positive impact on a child’s life is easy with The Joy Kids ExpressClick here to view a sample of ‘The Joy Kids Express’. Sharing joy has never been more fun!

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